Back to School, Back to School...

School is back in session.  I know I only have a one year old (what?! more on that later), but this time of year will always hold a special place in my heart. Before I was a mama, I was a 2nd grade teacher.  There's a saying that families breed teachers, and in my family, that is definitely the case.  My mother, sister, several aunts, uncles, and cousins are all educators.  Some elementary, some middle, some high school, but they are there.  Every day.  Giving their time, money, and sanity to a thankless profession with endless demands. 

I miss it sometimes (feel free to have me committed at any time).

Don't get me wrong, I love being a stay at home mom, but around this time of year, I get a little homesick for teaching.  The new folders, pencils, crayons, glue, backpacks, and lunchboxes do something to my heart that I can't explain.  I get this little tug that says, "Are you SURE you did the right thing?"  Of course I know the answer to that, but it doesn't mean I don't miss it.  I miss the stories.  I miss the things that came out of those little mouths, be them kind or not.  I miss their little laughs and their scared faces on the first day.  I miss their hugs and constant words of encouragement (I was ALWAYS beautiful in the eyes of a 2nd grader ;) ).  I miss my colleagues and grown up conversation.  I was blessed to work with some very fun, wonderful, and encouraging women (and few good men ;)) for four sweet years.  They will always hold a special place in my heart and I will always treasure those friendships.  I miss a lot of things, but then I remember...

I remember all the stress and anxiety that comes with teaching.  The money you spend from your own pocket to buy extra supplies and snacks.  All the changes you have to make year after year.  You learn a curriculum, only to have it changed the next year.  I've only been gone a year now and already so much has changed.  Thankfully I have a principal mom and a teacher sister to keep in the loop, but it's crazy, I tell you.  You are constantly at the mercy of someone who hasn't been in a classroom since they were in school but wants to dictate what you must do in order to have a successful year.  I remember calling my mom often my first year, in tears, telling her, "This is NOT what I went to school to do!  I didn't learn how to do ANY of this in college!"  I had a flair for the dramatics, what can I say? ;)  And then I remember my sweet baby boy.  I remember all the things I would be missing and all the time I would not be giving to him and I remember why I made the choice that I did.

Teacher-Mamas, my hat TRULY goes off to you.  I really don't know how you do it.  From loving 20 babies that aren't your own for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, to go home to love on the one baby/babies that belong to you is a task I'm not sure I could do.  I'm sure I would adapt and figure it out, but I applaud you. You are a better woman that me. It is not easy and no one but you knows what you're sacrificing to do the two hardest jobs in the world at the same time.  You are a super star...don't forget it. 

Whenever someone asks me what I do, I always tell them, "Well, I was a teacher, but I'm a stay at home mom now." And my sweet husband always corrects me.  He reminds me often that I am still a teacher. Sure it's not in the traditional sense, but I am teaching my child every day.  I don't get a fun classroom to decorate, but I am responsible for his academic well being until that sweet nugget toddles off to kindergarten (STOP--I am already emotional just thinking about it).  That is a whole new pressure.  It's one thing to be held accountable for the academic success of another person's child, but when it's your own that is a whole new ballgame. 

I am thankful for every moment in the past year I have had with my boy, but that doesn't mean each year when August rolls around, I won't get that same little tug on my heart.  I just have to remind myself, "Once a teacher, always a teacher."